In the last 26 years, Ed Molitor has developed his leadership skills in both athletics and business. From working as an NCAA Basketball coach at Texas A&M to becoming the Vice President of a national recruiting firm, Ed has taught countless athletes, coaches, and business leaders how to THINK, ACT, and EXECUTE at an elite level. Ed has a unique set of skills to deliver leaders across the country a purposeful, positive, energetic, and refreshing experience to unlock their true potential.
In 2016, Ed launched his company, The Molitor Group, in order to reach and add value to a larger sphere of ambitious individuals and help them achieve their goals every day. Through The Molitor Group, Ed has guided all types of leaders to achieve success. From entrepreneurs and executives to teams and companies, The Molitor Group specializes in empowering individuals and groups to achieve at the next level. Through Leadership Performance training, coaching, and speaking, Ed’s goal is to supply people and organizations with the necessary tools to move forward from where they are now to where they want to be.
Ed recalls the quote, “Every sinner has a future, and every saint has a past.” We are all flawed and have made mistakes and bad choices, but we’re capable of making amazing choices, too. It’s been a consistent pattern of behavior with Jacksonville ex-coach Urban Meyer that his last few stops have been about him and not about the people he leads.
Ed is no stranger to heated coaches’ meetings. Still, it’s unacceptable to start making personal attacks on the people who put their lives and careers on the line for you, especially when you’re making bad decisions on and off the field and in and out of the office. Urban Meyer is a perfect example of how not to be a leader, and there have been visible signs and behavior.
There’s a lot we can learn from situations like Urban Meyer, and that’s what we can do to be better leaders on and off the field. “The Man in the Glass,” by Dale Wimbrow Jr., is a poem that often comes to mind when Ed thinks about leadership and making poor decisions.
The Man in the Glass
When you get what you want in your struggle for self,
And the world makes you King for a day,
Then go to the mirror and look at yourself,
And see what that guy has to say.
For it isn’t your Father, or Mother, or Wife,
Who judgment upon you must pass.
The feller whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the guy staring back from the glass.
He’s the feller to please, never mind all the rest,
For he’s with you clear up to the end,
And you’ve passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the guy in the glass is your friend.
You may be like Jack Horner and “chisel” a plum,
And think you’re a wonderful guy,
But the man in the glass says you’re only a bum
If you can’t look him straight in the eye.
You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And get pats on the back as you pass,
But your final reward will be heartaches and tears
If you’ve cheated the guy in the glass.
We often talk about the word “victory” and what that means to us here at the Molitor Group and the answer is its value. However, the message behind Dale Wimbrow’s poem cannot serve you unless you have an incredibly strong set of protective values. As you climb the ladder of success, are you looking down at the people you’re leading, or are you pulling them up with you? Ed believes coaches like Urban are looking down on the people he leads.
Victory is way more than the wins and losses. Our values are the criteria by which we judge ourselves and others, and our character determines it. They are standards that dictate our attitude, communicate, and build a team that’s a part of something bigger than ourselves. With Urban Meyer, it was never about the team. He didn’t understand the honor it was or the responsibility of the head football coach of the Jacksonville Jaguars.
One of Ed’s top recommended leadership books that reflect on athletic leadership is Legacy about the New Zealand All Blacks. There’sThere’s a responsibility of putting on that black jersey and a commitment to the players who earned it. The book also focuses on having and improving self-awareness and staying grounded in honor of putting on that black jersey. The most significant present you can give the people in your life is the ability to be present, but Ed takes that a step forward and asks- how do you show up when you are present? Ensuring attitude, mindset, and character align with your values will help you make the most of every moment.
Take time to think about one of the best moments in your career, family, etc., where you displayed your leadership skills. These are the moments when you were listening to understand, setting aside judgment, or supporting someone by telling them what they needed to hear effectively. Write that down and spend some time thinking about what values of yours appeared in that moment. Next, do the reverse, write down a time when you weren’t at your best, and think about what values of yours didn’t show up with you.
Think about your code of conduct and what values you need to be your best version. Growth is evolution, and if we’re not authentic, we can get lost along the way. Align your actions with your values and start being true to yourself and your mission.
Welcome to the Athletics of Business, a podcast about how the traits and behaviors of elite athletes and remarkable business leaders frequently intersect. The real stories and hard lessons to help you level up your leadership and performance. Now your host, Ed Molitor.
Welcome back to another episode of the Athletics of Business podcast. I am your host and CEO of the Molitor Group, Ed Molitor, and I'm going to do something that they don't advise you to do as a podcaster and I'm going to timestamp this sucker. I'm recording this podcast on December 17, 2021 and that is important for a number of different reasons. First and most importantly, I want to wish everybody a happy holiday season. It's an incredible time of year. I'm blessed because I have a nine year old daughter, Maddie, and a seven year old son, E.J. And we're still in that phase in her life where it's really magical. I believe they still believe. Not to use the same word twice, one sentence, but I'm convinced that they still believe in Buddy the Elf.
And if they don't, they're doing a pretty good job of fooling mom and dad. And it's just a cool time, you know, it's just a great time to be a parent. And it's also important, it's also relevant to timestamp this because I'm going to talk to you about something today that was unexpected. It wasn't scripted. It wasn't something that a month and a half ago, as I laid out the podcast for the remainder of the year, that I had identified as would be the topic. But I remember growing up, my grandfather saying, my father reminded me of this the other day when were talking about something in the news that every sinner has a future and every saint has a past. And no, this is not going to be a religious conversation. It's very apropos for what we're going to talk about.
And that's Urban Meyer situation. And I agree wholeheartedly. We are all flawed, okay? We've all made poor choices. We have all made poor decisions. We've all made amazing choices and amazing decisions. Some better than others, some more consistently than others, and some more often than others. But enough is enough with Urban Meyer. And here's what I mean by that. It has been a consistent pattern of behavior that his last few stops, it has been about him. It hasn't been about the people that he leads. It certainly has not been about his family. It has not been about the careers and the livelihoods of those that he is in charge of, nor their families. And I mean, we don't have to go through the near weekly miscues from him, right? We don't talk about him kicking players, kicking his kicker. Okay?
We don't need to talk about calling coaches losers now. I've been in some heated coaches meetings, okay? I have been in some heated coaches meetings. When you start making personal attacks on the people that put their lives, their careers on the line for you, especially. Especially when you are making awful decisions on and off the field, in and out of the office as a leader. I mean, that takes some. That takes. That's just interesting. Okay, and how about the videos in October when he's. Whatever you want to call it, whether you want to call it instantly sitting there with his hands moving, whether you want to call it grinding, dancing, enjoying himself with a woman who was not obviously his wife, because his wife was at home or at their daughter's house. I believe in Columbus, watching the grandkids as he was out.
And needless to say that his team was flying back after a bad loss to. I believe it was Cincinnati after a bad loss in his team. And it's unheard of for a team not to travel with his coach. As a matter of fact, it's unheard of for a coach not to be on a team plane already breaking down game film from that day and the next opponent. So there's a whole path you can go down with that. You know, we don't have to talk about hiring a strength coach who reached a settlement at the University of Iowa with a number of players in the university for racist remarks and action and mistreatment of players. And there are so many ways to spend this. As you're sitting there listening to this, you could say, well, it's their word against. No, it's not. Okay.
I've been inside that world and the strength coaches right now. The strength coach in college football could be one of the single most important factors in your level of success, because they get to know the players on a very personal level, and they are really a window into the souls of your players. And to hire someone like that with the Jacksonville Jaguars, when you're trying to turn around and inject life into a franchise that has been struggling, it says a lot about you. Okay? And I'm not even going back to Ohio State, okay. When he was protecting an assistant from his previous stop. Who was with him, who was guilty of domestic violence, okay? We had a protection order against them. I'm not going to go into all the details. I don't want to screw anything up.
Because when you screw something up in today's society, people jump you and say, see? You don't know what you're talking about. I do know what I'm talking about. Urban Meyer is a God awful leader, and he's a perfect example of how not to be. And it's been a path he's been going down. There's been signs, there's been tells. There's been a consistent, as I said, pattern of behavior. And what's interesting is I was working out yesterday. I started thinking about today's solo cast and how I could connect the two and make it relevant for you and in your life moving forward in 2022. And the people that you lead at the office and the people that you lead at home. And a poem came to mind that I love. All right? And that's the man in the Glass.
Now, it really is called the Guy in the Glass, which I never knew, okay? And it was written by Dale Wimbrough Jr. Who was a composer, radio artist and writer in 1934. Now, this is not a history lesson, okay? So I won't go into when the name was changed or why it was changed. I just found that interesting. But the man in the Glass has always been something very significant in my life. But then something dawned on me that talking about Urban Meyer and the man in the Glass is. There's a catch 22 to it, right? There's a trick. So let me read a little bit of the man in the Glass, too. Matter of fact, I might go through the whole thing.
And when you get what you want and your struggle for self and the world makes you king for a day, then go to the mirror and look at yourself and see what that man has to say. For it isn't your father or mother or wife whose judgment upon you must pass, which I completely disagree with. The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life is the man staring back from the glass. He's a fellow to please, never mind all the rest, for he's with you clear up to the end. And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test. If the man in the glass is your friend, you may be like Jack Horner and chisel a plum and think you're a wonderful guy, but the man in the glass says you're only a bum. If you can't look them straight in the eye.
You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years and get pats on the back. As you pass. But your final reward will be heartaches and tears if you've cheated the man in the Glass. Now I love it, okay? And it's something that at certain points in my life, when I was making poor decisions, I would refer back to that. And that's one of, over the years, one of the many poems that I've had taped to a mirror or with me in my wallet in a little laminated card because I hold myself to a certain standard, though it doesn't may not always seem that way or has always seemed that way, but there's a reason for that and it comes back to right.
We've talked about the word victory and what that means to us here at the Molotov and what it means to my clients. And the very first letter is V. And that's values. And I don't believe that the man in the Glass, that poem can truly have an impact on you and serve you in the right way and serve the others that you lead unless you have an incredibly strong set of positive, productive values. Because Urban Meyer can very much look at the man in the glass and for it isn't your father or mother's wife whose judgment upon you must pass. The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life is the guy staring back from the glass. I really am convinced that Urban Meyer is so far gone and removed from reality that he might think it's okay. And he might.
And I shouldn't say that and I should not judge. I'm not here to judge. I'm here to teach. Right? And I'm here to talk about it. But his actions speak otherwise. And there's no justification, there's no spin, there's no looking the other way. But yet there's powerful lessons for you to learn from it. Because here is the number three coach on the all time winning percentage of college football. And he's an incredible college football coach. And folks are like, well, somebody's going to throw a lot of money at him to do tv. No, I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't know how a studio, a TV executive can put him in the studio and authentically talk and break down how teams and coaches are performing. I don't. And I do know this, though, if they do, I will not watch.
No big deal. It's not a big deal to Urban Meyer. Not it shouldn't be a big deal to you, but that's just the way I'm wired now. Will another college hire him? I don't know. And if another college does hire him, people may say, well, you see, I told you so. You told me what? That Urban Meyer, the third time, all time winning this coach, percentage wise, in college football, is a survivor. That's great, because there is absolutely no reason for him to have to relegate himself to being a survivor in the game of college football with the exception of the fact his actions and his behaviors and his decision making and the way he treated others, valued himself, and devalued others. Now, think about that in terms of your leadership, okay?
As you climb the ladder of success, are you looking down at those you lead or are you pulling them up with you? I truly believe that Urban is looking down at those that he leads. I really do. You know, so values, why are they so important? Well, they are our most deeply held beliefs. What is it that we believe? They're our highest priorities. There are non negotiables. Our values represent absolutely what we stand for. And here's something that I love, and again, I just. I'm not judging, but this is very significant. Our values are the criteria by which we judge ourselves. And it's also the criteria by which we judge others.
And I know we're not supposed to judge others, but I'll tell you what, if I'm trying to jump in your orbit or trying to pull you into my inner circle and I want to develop a deep relationship, you better be dang sure I'm judging you. I'm watching you closely. I'm evaluating what you do, how you treat people. It's way more than the wins and losses. Victory is way more than just winning. It's way more than just a number. See, our values determine our character. And our character absolutely without question determines our value. Now, what else are values? Well, they're the standards that guide our actions. Okay, thank Urban Meyer. They're the standards that guide our evaluations, our choices, our inner circle. They're the standards that guide our attitude from the minute we wake up every morning. And they also dictate how we communicate.
And people ask, eh, you know, I kind of have an idea what my values are. No, you need to have an absolute, crystal clear knowledge of what your values are. And you have to be able to articulate them to everybody in your life. The people that you lead, the people in your home, any organization that you are a part of. Can you articulate your values? I'll tell you mine right now. It's real simple. They're all off my tongue. Transformation, fundamentals, compassion, mental toughness and vision. And I did not just name those. I did not just one day come up with those. That was an absolute deep dive exercise with my good friends Tim Hogan and Peter Zapp. And I mean, we ripped things apart. We tore them down.
We went through whys and hows and vision exercises and those are my five core, unshakable, non negotiable values. Doesn't mean I'm perfect. Far from it. Doesn't mean I'm flawless. Absolutely not. Does it mean that I have a good foundation where I can build authentic relationships that are driven by trust? Absolutely does. Absolutely does. And can I get the people that I lead to work hard to be a part of something bigger than themselves? Sure can. Because I am. And I don't think with Urban Meyer, never was it about the team. I don't think he understood the honor it was and responsibility that came with being the head football coach of the Jacksonville Jaguars. In a few weeks I'm going to have one of the all time great Jacksonville Jaguar greats on the podcast and I cannot wait to talk to him. Tom McManus.
We grew up together in Arlington Heights, Illinois and Tom is very still very involved with the community in Jacksonville as well as with the Jags organization, some fashion and he has a podcast and a radio show and he is passionate and he is positive and he tells it like it is. Okay, and I can't wait to get into that. But if you've been listening to the podcast for a while, you know that one of my all time favorite leadership books that reflects back on athletic lessons from athletics is the book is Legacy and it's about the New Zealand All Blacks, right? Probably the single greatest sports franchise in the history of professional sports, regardless of geographical location, regardless of sport, regardless of league and the New Zealand Rugby Club. It's just amazing. The book Legacy.
What the All Blast can teach us about business and life. Get it. If you haven't got it, get it. I'll put a link to it in the show notes along with the video that my good friend and podcast guest John Sabatello shared with me yesterday, just out of blue sent me an email and said, hey, pretty sure you'll like this. John's pretty smart guy and he was spot on. And he has been on episode number 62, episode number 100. And it is a video that explains what it means to be an All Black and some of the things that are on there I thought were very apropos to talk about today. And it talks about the responsibility of that black jersey with the silver trim and it's third time. Third time.
Meaning the players that finally have earned the right to be on the All Blacks. It's third time. And that jersey. And it's their responsibility to enhance that legacy. Better men make better All Blacks. Think about that. Now, obviously we can say better women. I'm just reading what was put in front of me, what I printed out here. Better men make better All Blacks. That's really about self improvement. And in the book they talk quite a bit about self awareness. And you know where we are with self awareness, the number one determining factor of C level executives success, level of success, self awareness and the ability to embrace what it is you learned about yourself. It goes on to say it's not only about rugby, it's about life. Young men driving together to produce something that they are proud of.
Is Urban Meyer proud of what he produced? This is not. Beat Urban Meyer up. I could care less if he ever gets back in the game. This has. What he has done has no impact on my life other than the fact I have some lessons to share with you and leave you with as we get into the holiday season here. Okay. Because it's something to think about as you plan out the new year. How are you showing up for the people that you lead? How are you showing them? Here's something else. It encompasses the idea that you can always better, whether it's off the field out of the office or on the field in the office. And if you have that characteristic to always better, then you'll be great again. Great people make great teams.
And if you recognize how much of an honor it is to pull on that black jersey. So how much of an honor had I mentioned about being a coach in the NFL, being a coach for Jacksonville Jaguars? Then you will know that all things are possible. It's not only about playing great rugby on the rugby field. It's about how these young men conduct themselves off the pitch. That humbleness, keeping your feet on the ground and realizing that you can get better all the time. Okay, that's enough from that. But that just some incredible stuff. And that's speaking by another violent sport. People that are incredibly, physically, mentally and emotionally tough. But it comes down to who they are as people and how they treat others and how they honor what they are a part of.
You know, we always talk about the greatest present you can give to the people in your life is the present of being present. But I'm going to take that a step further. How do you show up when you're present? How do you show up as a leader, how do you show up to your family? There's been times when I've either been on coaching staffs or been in the office with leaders where they were present. Ooh, were they present. But man, it wasn't very good. It wasn't very pretty. Is your thought, is your mindset, is your behavior, is it aligned with your values? And is it productive in the moment? Is it purposeful and productive in the moment? And is it about them, not you? And I think that's something that's so important.
And I want to leave you with an exercise that I do with my clients when I work with organizations in their leadership teams. And I've done this with my executive coaching clients one one. And it's something that I think is. It would be a cool exercise for you to think about your values. We call it the spotlight exercise. And the first thing I want you to do is I want you to take time and think about one of the best moments in your career or one of the best moments with your family. But one of the best moments where your full leadership display was at its best, where you nailed it. All right? You were listening to understand, you were delaying your judgment. You're asking great follow up questions. Are you.
You push people outside their comfort zone and you supported them the right way and gave them the feedback that they were seeking and told them what they needed to hear, not just what they want to hear. You get the picture, right? Or it could be a performance. It could be somewhere where you just nailed it. You had a client and you were just on and they gave you every roadblock, every adversity, every challenge, every distraction, but you stayed the course and you found a way. Just whatever it is, whatever peak experience you have, I want you to write that down and then take some time and talk about what values of yours showed up during that experience. So for me, in terms of coaching, my peak experiences have included transformational moments. They've included going back to the fundamentals and the basics.
They've included having compassion for someone that I was leading, absolute mental toughness and quite a bit of it. And vision. Vision shows up. But just think about that and what value showed up. Now that's not enough, right? Because there's going to be times we struggle and there's going to be times where we come up short. Now, I want you to think of times when you suppressed your values didn't show up, and write down that moment. It could be a meeting, it could be a one one. It could be just a situation. Write that down. And what values did you suppress? What values didn't show up that would have helped the situation, would have helped you be more successful. And then the final one, and the final one is really significant. The third one is your code of conduct.
What values need to show up for you to be the best version of yourself? I'm not saying that soft, not saying that to be cute. I'm saying that to be real. For you to be the best leader, for you to be the best coach, for you to be the best performer, producer, team member, for you to be the best team. What values need to show up? And write down what the best version of yourself looks like and write down what values show up. Then here's what you're going to do. And I'm talking a little bit quicker here because it's a podcast and you can always reach out to me and I'll mail you this along with a couple other values exercises and some resources. You can email me at edthemolitorgroup.
M O L I T O R group.com I would be happy to send you a resource page along with some exercises on values. Okay, so then you're going to take the central theme chunk, all your values together. So take them all. And the one I use that really makes sense is I could have a group of values that showed up. It could be positive attitude, positive energy, optimist, right? Positive mental attitude, positivity. Those all kind of fall under for me, I think those all fall under positivity. Or you can use positive energy to describe all those. And then you want to come up with three to five. Some folks like five to seven. I like three to five. Keep it simple. Things that you can lean into and are the foundation for your success. Because those are the fundamentals, right?
But those are the things that you are going to go back to as you lead. Why is this so significant? It's because it's who you are. And it's because it's who you are, it's what you stand for. And the more discipline you have in these activities of developing your values and living them out and making them a way of your life. Right? Just make them a way of life. If you can sit there and make your values a way of life, you keep the values in front of you. You talk about them, articulate them, be intentional every single day. As a matter of fact, we have a victory defined journal that's coming out and inside of that we have a journal guide that talks to you about how to do certain things.
And one of them is how to identify one value that you are going to lean into that day and how it's going to show up and who you're going to serve on your team with that value. Or what client or what customer. Okay. And then at the end of the day, you run the feedback loop and how did you do? All right, you journal it. But make living your values. It doesn't mean it's easy. It doesn't mean you aren't going to fail, doesn't mean that people aren't going to get ticked at you. Doesn't mean every day is going to be perfect. You might have more bad days than good, but you've got a tool. And I don't even want to say a tool. You've got a resource. You've got something that you can lean into. That's you, that's real, that's true.
And gives you this level of self confidence. It helps your decision making, it helps your relationships. It helps build trust with everybody in your circle. And I think that's something going back to Urban Meyer. I think that's something that he got away from a long time ago. And it's scary because he's had the ability to sit in front of a camera, look at the camera and lie and spin. And that's what happens when you get removed. I don't think that's always the way he was. I believe that's not always the way he was. But at some point along the way, you can get lost if you're not authentic to yourself. We talk all the time about being authentic to others, right? Honest with others, operate with integrity. Means your words and actions are in alignment and be vulnerable.
But what about being authentic with yourself? How your thoughts, beliefs, behaviors and values align with your actions. I think that's huge. Now I wish you just an incredible holiday season. Embrace it. Hug it. I know for some it's a tough time of the year. Struggles lost loved ones over the years. But try to find a way to grab the magic. And as a leader, that's what you try to do every single day, isn't it? Try to find a way to grab the magic and share it. I wish you all happy holiday, Merry Christmas and a very happy new year and all the best in the new year. I look forward to our upcoming podcast. I think you're going to love what we have for you. There'll be another solo cast.
We have some great guests coming up in 2022 and a lot of new stuff from the Molotor group to share with you. Take care.
Thank you for listening to the Athletics of Business. Be sure to give us a rating and review so we know how we're doing. For more information about the show, visit theathletics of business.com now get out there. Think, act and execute at the highest level to unleash your greatness.